My life has been so… interrupted I want to say. I feel like I’m barely coming out of a period of serious upheaval. As in.. couldn’t go one day without really worrying or more like planning something out seriously. Too much brain power expended if you ask me.
It started with a 5.5 year relationship ending. Then having to start my life over because I just so happened to be stepping into a wonderful new career at the same time. Moving out and figuring out what to do with all kinds of shared things is just no fun. I left as much behind as I could and I really don’t miss anything. I feel I could’ve left with the clothes on my back and been fine.
I have been in my new position for almost 2 months now. It wanes. Sometimes I am super busy and have to get serious about prioritizing, then there are days like today where I had a good four hours to do absolutely nothing. I mean, I could’ve re-organized some files, or researched the competition, or made sales calls. I felt I was pretty well caught up and just wanted to be there for the sake of being there today. I love the responsibility that I have. I am there by myself a lot of days from opening the front door to locking up at night. Such a feeling of freedom. I am blessed.
Maybe two weeks after my last relationship ended, I was introduced to a new girl. My first thoughts were, whoa! this is way too early. Something kept me questioning who she could turn out to be and I couldn’t stop wondering if I should say forget timeframes and see what happens. SO I did of course, continue to get to know her that is. And its turned into something very beautiful.
Freedom. She lets me feel free. Free from worry, free from doubt, free from guilt and pressure. Maybe because its still so new, or maybe just because she is what I was looking for and this is how falling in love is supposed to feel all the time. Free.
I’m in a good place in my life. Thank you God for helping to place me in this wonderful time. I love my job. I’m growing in knowledge and professionalism every day, at the same time getting close to people and being able to be counted on.
I love my new smaller apartment and the view of the pond and trees off the patio. Its really pretty and peaceful.
I love this feeling I’m getting in my new relationship, of just idling and enjoying each day.
Yup. Life is good. Really good. Wherever you are, tell yourself what you want and express that you are willing to do whatever it takes and poof! Watch changes start to make way for the new life you’ve asked for. It can be rough, but if you hold out its definitely worth the ride.
Night.
